One Night Wonder
by YaoiCommanderForever
Summary: Sanji, the man of many nights of passion, can have anyone he desires. So how does a challenge gone wrong end up with him being the one to chase down his target? ((okay i've changed my mind, I may write more))
1. Chapter 1

"Alllllright which piece of ass should I go for next" the blonde drawled after he downed his drink in one swallow.

"Let's face it Sanji you've been with just about everyone here, there isn't any challenge to it any more" the curly haired, long nosed man said with a sigh as he took a sip of his drink.

"You kidding?! There's always a challenge Usopp, come on pick someone" Sanji persisted.

Usopp sighed again and looked around the bar, hoping to find something that would shut the other up. Then his eyes landed on someone he knew he had never seen before and pointed him out to the curly browed man "Alright him, never seen him before so he obviously isn't from around here".

Sanji looked in the direction his curly haired friend pointed "who? Moss head? bah he doesn't look like a challenge at all".

"Hey you asked... unless you're scared you'll fail" Usopp teased.

"The great Sanji Black? Fail? Never!" Sanji scoffed and got up from the table, making his way through the crowd over to the bar.

His target, a well built green haired man, had a bottle of booze in one hand and a scowl on his face.

Sanji tsked and slid up to the bar beside him "Yo bar keep, can I get a gin 'n tonic?".

The greenette beside him didn't give Sanji's presence any notice, too absorbed in his drink to care.

Sanji eyed the man up and down, resting his chin on the palm of his hand as he leaned closer "Name's Sanji, you are?"

"Not interested" the man grunted then took a deep drink from the bottle.

"Oh that's real original" Sanji snorted, taking his drink from the bartender with a thanks "Coming from a guy drinking in a singles bar, if you aren't here to find a little amore then why the hell are you here hm?".

"None of your business" the guy grunted again as he finished off his bottle and ordered another.

"Oh don't grunt at me like a caveman, I'm just trying to make polite conversation; you're lucky I'm not like most of the guys around here who use cheesy pick up lines to try to get into your pants" Sanji said with a frown as he took a drink "let me guess, your significant other is cheating on you and you're here to drown your sorrows".

"Not even close dart brow" the greenette grumbled as he glared at the blond.

"Oi! who the fuck are you calling dart brow, marimo" Sanji growled as he glared back.

"Are you stupid or did your eyebrows eat your brain?" the man asked, his scowl deepening.

"I should be asking you that since you have a swamp monster trying to devour your head" the blond growled as he pointed at the other's hair.

"You looking for a fight asshole?" the greenette snapped as he got up from his seat.

"Maybe I am dick head" the blond also stood, getting in the other's face.

Several people around them were watching the scene. The bartender came over and tried to defuse the situation "hey now you two there's a rule against fights in the club, you wanna hash something out you take it outside".

"Tsk it's not even worth it" the greenette sat back down in his seat and picked up his bottle again.

"What? To scared I'll whip your ass?" Sanji asked with a sneer while silently wondering how this went from trying to get in the guys pants to trying to kick his ass.

"Nope, just don't feel like wasting good booze" the guy answered then downed the rest of the bottle.

The blond growled and took his seat. Picking up his glass and downing the rest of it. He looked back at where he left Usopp and found him smirking smugly at Sanji. Bristling, he sent the long nose a scathing glare before turning back to the man beside him.

"So then if it isn't a cheating significant other why are you acting as if someone shoved a stick up your ass... are you the one cheating?" Sanji asked as he stared at the other, determined to get an answer.

"Do I seriously look like someone who would cheat?" the greenette growled as he glared heatedly at the blond "now piss off and let me drink in peace".

"You seriously think you'll get peace in a singles bar? What planet are you from marimo?" Sanji asked with a snort, the guy was too funny "no you don't look like someone who would cheat but you never know, it's always the last person you think it would be".

"No body cheated on anybody you dumb ass" he snapped, the bottle in his hand creaking from the pressure.

"Alright then, your partner left you" Sanji guessed making him growl.

"There is no partner, there never was a partner, and there never will be a partner!" the greenette snarled as he slammed the bottle down on the counter causing more looks to be shot there way.

"Yeesh touchy, does that mean you're a virgin?" Sanji asked with a smirk, mentaly cackling.

"You really want hit don't you? No I'm not a damn virgin" the stranger snapped as he pointed at Sanji.

"But you just said there was never a partner so that means you're a virgin moss head" Sanji murmured in amusement before finishing his drink.

"You don't need to have a parnter to have sex, ever heard of one night stands?" the marimo growled as he glared at the blond beside him.

"I have but I've never had one, I think it is just awful to do something like that to the person you slept with" Sanji said with a scoff then he eyed the greenette and purred with a smirk "is that why you're acting the way you are? Someone left you in bed all alone the morning after?".

"Why the fuck are you over here annoying me? Shouldn't you go chase skirts or something?" the marimo growled as he glared at the blonde man that wouldn't seem to leave him alone.

"Haha! That's it! You got left and now you're trying to drink yourself into oblivion to forget that night of passion" Sanji crowed with a smirk, giving himself a mental pat on the back for figuring it out.

"Who the fuck are you Dr. Phil? Gonna tell me that mommy didn't love me enough or that daddy got too touchy?" he snapped as he glared at Sanji, this guy was really starting to piss him off and he wasn't even buzzed yet "quite trying to psychoanalyze me".

Sanji raised an eyebrow at hearing that "Did daddy get too touchy?".

The green haired man glared murderously at the blond that sat next to him; alright that was it. Before Sanji could say anything else that would dig him an even deeper grave he was tackled out of his seat making several of the people around them cry out in surprise.

The blond landed with an ouff, the greenette landing on top of him. They rolled around on the floor for a moment, kicking and hitting each other. Suddenly they were both grabbed by the collars of their shirts and pulled apart by the bouncer of the club, a big burly man that had a crew cut and several scars. "No fighting in the club" he growled as he dragged them over to the door and tossed them outside.

They both landed next to each other on the curb, both glaring at the door that was shut in their faces.

"Tch, see if I ever come back here again" Sanji muttered as he dusted his suit off, scowling at the wrinkles.

The greenette got up from the ground and turned to head off in some random direction. Sanji noticed this and followed after him "Oi where are you going?".

"To find somewhere else to drink since you fucking got us kicked out!" the marimo snapped.

"You're the one who tackled me!" Sanji snapped back.

"You wouldn't leave me the fuck alone!" the green haired man snarled.

"Hey, I was just trying to start a conversation with you, you were the one being a prick" Sanji said with a scowl.

"Did it ever occur to you that maybe I didn't WANT to talk!" the greenette snapped.

"You never answered my question" Sanji said changing the subject.

The greenette scowled at the blonde and stopped walking "what the hell are you talking about?".

"Were you in there drinking to forget a one night stand?" Sanji asked as he crossed his arms.

The marimo glared at the blond and began walking again. Sanji hurried after him and growled "would you just answer! If you don't then I'm just going to assume it's a yes".

The greenette turned around so fast the blond almost ran into him "So what if it is! Happy now or do you want me to kick your ass!".

"See that wasn't so bad now was it" Sanji said with a huff "is it the reason you've decided to never have a relationship?".

"Are you some demented psychiatrist?" the greenette snapped as he glared at the blond, why wouldn't he leave him alone!

"No, I'm just someone that believes everyone should be happy with their significant other" Sanji told him.

The green haired man scoffed at that and said "relationships are for weak willed idiots who can't take being alone".

"You've never been in a relationship so how would you know?" Sanji said as he scowled at the man.

"You just answered your own question dumbass, I'm fine with being alone and I don't give a shit about relationships" the greenette drawled as he stared disinterestedly at the blonde.

"You are so full of shit, just a minute ago you were trying to drowned yourself in alcohol because some dumbass fucked you and ran" Sanji snapped irritably, he hated it when people were all hypocrytical and in denial like this poor fuck in front of him.

"Whatever, I don't have to listen to this" the marimo grumbled, turning and continuing on his way.

Sanji hurried after the guy, he could be just as hard headed as the next guy if he wanted to be "you know, it takes more strength to be in a relationship than to not be in one".

"Oh yeah, how's that, please enlighten me" the greenette said sarcastically.

"Well for one it takes work to make a relationship a happy one, to keep your partner happy. You have to balance time between them, your job, and your social life. Whenever there's a fight you can't just call it quits and leave them in the dust, you gotta find ways to compromise and get past all the anger and frustration. You have to build trust between the two of you, a greater trust than even that of friends to the point you can tell that person anything no matter what it is and they will stick by you till the end despite all your faults. That is a relationship... that is love in its truest form" Sanji explained passionately.

The green haired man was quiet for a few minutes before he snorted and said "you sound like such a girl".

Sanji nearly fell on his face at hearing that, this guy was unbelievable! "You're the one wallowing in self pity just because you were dumped, if anyone is a girl it's you; you're giving up on something before you've even given it a chance".

"For the record I wasn't dumped, it was a drunken night of sex with a random stranger and just so you know, relationships are bull shit and they never work out from what I've seen; it's nothing but a headache and not worth the trouble" the green haired man told the blonde that was following him like a puppy.

"Then go out with me!" Sanji blurted out before he could even think about what he was saying.

This made the greenette pause and turn to stare at the blonde incredulously "what?".

"Go out with me, let me show you that a relationship isn't worthless" Sanji insisted.

The marimo barked a laugh and said "what are you? stupid? why would I want to do something like that?".

"It's either that or admit you're a wuss and are scared of getting your heart crushed" Sanji insisted.

"You're insane! Quite following me" the greenette snapped as he turned and kept walking.

"WUSS!" Sanji called after him, still following "come on admit you're a pussy! Nothing wrong with being scared you big baby".

"I'm not scared now get lost or I'll kick your ass!" the marimo snarled as he walked faster.

Since Sanji's legs were longer he kept up easily "Not till you either admit to being a scaredy cat or agree to go out with me!".

"Fuck fine I'll fucking go out with you!" he snarled as he stopped and turned to glare at the man.

Sanji stopped as well and smiled smugly, pulling his phone out "knew you would see it my way, let me have your name and number and I'll call you later to set everything up".

Snarling he snatched the phone from the blondes hand and added his contact info then gave it back "Now quite following me!".

"Alright I'll see you later" Sanji said with a grin as he turned and walked away, whistling a random tune to himself.

The greenette glared after the blond as he watched him walk away. He sighed and turned, going his own way.

Sanji pulled is phone out and looked at his newest contact, so the guy's name is Zoro eh? Well this should be fun.


	2. Chapter 2

Zoro honestly didn't expect the crazy bastard to call him. He had seen the guy drinking with some curly haired long nosed guy and had assumed they were having some kind of competition when the long nose pointed at people and the blond seemed smug. Guy was probably a slut and was trying to get into as many pants as possible.

Zoro was probably his next target but he had shot the guy down almost immediately. That's why Zoro just didn't expect the guy to call him. When his phone rang and there was an unknown number flashing on the screen it didn't even cross his mind that someone he didn't want to talk to was on the other end.

"Roronoa speaking" Zoro grunted out as he answered the phone and hit the speaker button. He was currently lifting weights and he wasn't going to stop just because someone couldn't wait to call him.

"Roronoa huh? Nice last name" said an annoyingly familiar voice.

"Whatever it is you're selling I'm not buying" Zoro told him, getting a noise of annoyance from the blond.

"I'm not a shitty telemarketer you jackass, I'm just calling to set up the time for our date" the guy Zoro had oh so affectionately dubbed as captain annoying stated.

"Who said I was going on a date with you?" Zoro huffed, his eyebrow twitching.

"You did, last night" captain annoying helpfully reminded the forgetful marimo "it was either that or admit to being a wuss, great choice by the way".

"What's to stop me from hanging up on you and blocking your number?" Zoro growled.

"What's to stop me from using someone else's phone to call you?" captain annoying countered.

"What's to stop me from changing my number?" Zoro shot back.

"Then that just makes you a shitty coward scared to go on one date that you had promised you would go on" Sanji told him with such obvious smug satisfaction that it made all the hairs on Zoro's body stand on end.

"I should have just ditched you last night" Zoro growled in annoyance.

"Mm you were just too intrigued by my charismatic ways" Sanji said with a suave tone to his voice.

"I wanted you to quit stalking me actually" Zoro pointed out, causing Sanji to sputter out indignant curses at the moss head.

"I was not stalking you" Sanji refuted.

"Stalking, harassing, it's all the same" Zoro shrugged as he finished the last rep and set his weights down. That earned him a few more curses. Zoro wasn't going to say it out loud but he was kind of enjoying pissing off the blond, picturing the looks his ridiculous face was making wasn't half bad either.

There was a loud crash on the other end of the phone that Zoro would deny ever made him jump. A second later there was shouting and cursing of multiple different people that Zoro couldn't make heads nor tails of. More crashing happened then silence followed for a long minute where Zoro wondered if the blond had gotten jumped and knocked out.

"Stupid shitty bastards" Sanji finally grumbled over the phone, sounding rather annoyed at someone who wasn't Zoro "Sorry about that, I'm at work".

"I didn't ask" Zoro said dryly.

"So about that date, I was thinking tomorrow night at my place; I'll cook us a nice dinner and we can spend the evening getting to know each other" Sanji changed the subject.

"How do I know you aren't just going to drug or poison me?" Zoro huffed suspiciously.

"Because if I were to ever mistreat food in such a way I would kick my own ass" Sanji snapped and Zoro had a feeling he had hit a nerve that the blond didn't like being poked.

"Whatever, your food probably tastes like shit" Zoro grunted.

"My food is the best damn thing you will have ever tasted and you won't want to eat anything else after you have tasted it" Sanji boasted "You'll just have to see for yourself tomorrow night".

"And who said I was free tomorrow night?" Zoro huffed "I do have a life you know, you can't just decide I'm going to your place without finding out if I'm free".

"Well are you?" Sanji huffed in annoyance.

"I- yes but that isn't the point!" Zoro said, slightly flustered and annoyed that the blond was completely missing his point.

"Great! I will see you tomorrow then, just meet me outside the bar where we first met and I'll take you to my place" Sanji said cheerfully and it just made Zoro want to punch him.

"Fine, whatever" Zoro grunted then hung up on the guy before he broke his own phone out of sheer annoyance.

After that time seemed to pass far too quickly for the green haired man. Before he knew it the next day had come and it was time for him to get ready to go meet the blond. He was tempted to just skip this all together but he knew that if he didn't go the idiot would just blow up his phone with annoying messages crying about how Zoro stood him up.

Since they weren't going out anywhere and Zoro didn't particularly care how he looked, he dressed in his acid washed jeans and one of his band t-shirts. He pocketed his keys, wallet, and phone then walked out the door and tried to remember his way to the random bar he had picked. He started walking in what he felt was the right direction and tucked his hands in his pockets as he leisurely walked down the street.

What was only supposed to take an hour to walk turned into four hours as the buildings and signs kept moving. He eventually made it to the bar but it was starting to grow dark. He spotted the blond leaning against the bar with a cigarette between his lips.

"You're late" Sanji grunted in annoyance, not bothering to move from his position.

"How can I be late, you didn't specify a time" Zoro huffed at him.

"It's nearly dark, normal people show up at a decent time" Sanji shot at him "never mind, let's just get going so I have enough time to finish cooking, thankfully I prepped everything before coming here so it won't take long to finish".

The two started walking down the sidewalk, both with their hands stuffed in their pockets. Sanji cast a glance at Zoro as they walked and he eyed the clothing the other was wearing "Do you always dress like a delinquent?".

Zoro shot an annoyed glance at the blond, taking in the dress shirt and slacks he wore "Do you always dress like a douche?".

Sanji let out an offended noise "unlike you I have to represent an establishment of fine dining, if I were to wander around looking like a high school dropout it would bring shame on my old man and his restaurant".

"All I heard was 'why yes I do always dress like a douche, thank you for noticing', does your old man know how well you're representing his restaurant by harassing strangers at random in bars?" Zoro said as he shot a smirk at the other who's stupid swirlybrowed face was starting to flush from irritation.

"I do not harass random strangers" Sanji hissed as he kicked out at Zoro's ankle, the other man hopping to the side to dodge it "usually people are quite receptive to my flirtations, you're just the uncouth exception that prefers to pick fights than to flirt".

"Tch all I saw that night was a thirsty bastard who didn't know when to quit, do you realize how desperate you come off when someone tells you no?" Zoro said with a huff and again dodged a kick aimed at his ankles.

"People who go to a SINGLES bar aren't usually there to just get drunk and wallow in misery" Sanji snapped as he shot the green haired man the stink eye "you're the only sorry ass bastard who would go to drink at a bar full of people looking to get laid and expect them to not hit on you; then again people probably stay away from you because they think you're growing mold on your head".

"You realize you make a shitty date right?" Zoro commented with a bored expression.

"I'll show you shitty date" Sanji growled and picked up the pace slightly, marching his way back home "hurry your ass up so we can fucking eat".

Zoro followed after the blond and after some walking they ended up at Sanji's apartment building. They took the elevator up to the blond's flat and Sanji led the way into the relatively fancy looking apartment.

"Ritzy digs you got" Zoro commented with a bored tone as he looked around the spotless place.

"With how well the Baratie is doing I'm able to afford a slightly pricier living space than I normally would be able to, plus I have a small side business of my own that I'm hoping to one day make as big as the Baratie; I can't ride the old man's coat tails forever" Sanji explained as he went into the kitchen "Want something to drink?".

"Got anything strong?" Zoro asked as he followed after him.

"I have wine" Sanji told him as he opened a closet and showed the other his wine rack.

"Wine is so weak and fruity" Zoro groaned and scowled at the bottles.

"I don't do a lot of drinking moss head and anyone I bring home isn't looking to get sloshed, it's mainly just to have with our meal".

"I could drink your entire wine collection and not get a buzz" Zoro huffed in annoyance.

"You're not drinking all of my wine" Sanji told him as he took out a bottle that would go good with the meal he was preparing and setting it on the counter "Why don't you take a seat, we can talk while I finish preparing the food".

Zoro tsked but took a seat at the table and slouched in the chair with a grumpy look on his face, he should have brought his own booze.

"So you know what I do for a living, what do you do?" Sanji decided to break the ice as he moved about the kitchen.

"I'm a professional fighter" Zoro explained with a shrug.

Sanji paused and glanced back at him with a curious look "like those fake wrestling matches they show on tv?".

Zoro scowled in annoyance "No not like the fake wrestling they show on tv. I do several forms of martial arts, I sword fight, and I box".

"Huh" Sanji mused as he looked the man up and down "I guess I can see you doing something like that, do you enjoy it?".

Zoro paused at the blond's last question, not having expected it "mm I guess I do, my goal is to one day be the champion".

"That's a pretty big goal" Sanji whistled "How close are you at getting there?".

"Not close enough" Zoro huffed in annoyance, thinking back to his fight with Mihawk and how he had lost almost immediately.

"Mm you look determined enough, I'm sure you'll get there eventually" Sanji shrugged and turned back to his food. Zoro watched the man move, silently reaccessing him after that conversation… not much but enough that Zoro thought that maybe the guy wasn't completely all bad… only a little though, he was still an annoying pain in the ass.

Sanji asked a few more questions that Zoro answered and the blond told him information in return. Soon the food was done and Sanji was setting the last plate on the table. He grabbed the bottle of wine and popped the cork, filling both their glasses before sitting down.

Zoro had to silently admit, everything did smell and look great. He picked up his fork and took a bite. Unfortunately he couldn't keep a straight face as the flavor took him by surprise. Sanji was watching the man, a smug smile stretched across his unibanged face; he always enjoyed watching people who tasted his food for the first time, it was almost as satisfying as great sex.

Zoro noticed the look and smoothed his features into a bored expression as he continued to eat, he was not giving the bastard a stroke to his ego. "Tastes better than I expected it to" he said indifferently.

Sanji's satisfied face nearly slipped into one of indignation, he caught himself at the last second though because he knew the guy was just messing with him "It's the best damn thing you've ever eaten in your life".

"Well I wouldn't go that far" Zoro shrugged as he took another bite, no way was he going to give him the satisfaction of being right because god damn it the guy really did know how to cook… It wasn't fair.

This time Sanji's face fell into a scowl and he gave Zoro the stink eye "you're a dirty little liar and you'll burn in hell for it".

Zoro gave the blond an amused smirk "Am I a liar? How would you know? Do you stalk me when I go out to eat too?".

"For the last time I was not stalking you!" Sanji snapped, resisting the urge to throw his fork at the bastard's face.

"Then what do you call following someone who doesn't want to be followed?" Zoro asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Just shut up and eat your damn food" Sanji growled in annoyance, taking a bite of his own dish with a little more force than was necessary.

Zoro just grinned smugly and continued to eat his own food, okay so maybe this wasn't such a bad time but it still didn't prove to him that relationships were worth it.

Their meal went on like this as they ate; Sanji would ask a question, Zoro would answer, they would talk a bit and then someone would say something that would start a little bickering match between them then they would fall into silence and it would start all over again.

When the food was gone Sanji cleaned up their dishes and somehow managed to rope Zoro into helping him by drying them while Sanji washed. This task was done in silence, neither man feeling the need to fill the silence as they fell into a rhythm. When everything was clean and the dishes that needed to soak were doing so, the two men moved to the living room and had a seat on the blond's couch.

"So now what? We ate and talked" Zoro said as he slouched down into the probably very expensive couch.

"We could play a game" Sanji shrugged where he sat, sitting his glass of wine down on the coffee table and pulling out his phone "a friend of mine showed me this game not too long ago". Sanji opened the app and showed it to Zoro "it's kind of like charades, basically how you play is you hold the phone screen pointed out so you can't see it and the person you are playing with has to give you hints. It's timed so if you don't get it right you miss, miss too many and you lose; if you get it right you tip the phone so it moves onto the next".

"Sounds kind of dumb but I'll play" Zoro shrugged and Sanji set up the app. The blond held up the phone so that it faced Zoro first and he waited to start. The first prompt lit up the screen.

"What's something associated with spring?" Zoro prompted.

"Flowers" Sanji said immediately and Zoro nodded so Sanji tilted the phone to change the prompt.

"What do you do when you trip?" Zoro questioned.

"Fall" Sanji shot out and he got that one right too.

Zoro squinted at the next prompt, he honestly had no idea what that one was.

"Well what is it?" Sanji said in annoyance.

"I don't know, I've never heard of it before" Zoro griped.

The phone buzzed and Sanji huffed in annoyance that Zoro made him lose a point.

"Building in New York" Zoro told him.

"Empire state building" Sanji said and got it right so he flicked the phone and changed to the next prompt.

They kept going like this and Sanji got more annoyed when Zoro made him miss a prompt. They bickered for a bit which caused Sanji even more time and in the end the blond wasn't too happy with his score.

"Let's see you do better asshole" Zoro huffed as he snatched the phone and started the game.

"Tue es une grosse tête verte stupide" Sanji said with a grin.

Zoro scowled in annoyance "What the fuck are you saying?".

"Quelle? Tu ne connais pas le français?" Sanji asked with mock surprise.

The phone buzzed and Zoro scowled at the blond "What the fuck!".

"Not my fault you can't understand french" Sanji shrugged and read the next prompt "it's the longest structure in the world".

"I don't fucking know" Zoro hissed in annoyance.

"Oh come on everyone fucking knows what the longest structure in the world is!" Sanji exclaimed as the phone buzzed "The great wall of China you airhead!".

"Shut your fucking face, if anyone here is the airhead it's your blond ass" Zoro snapped then growled as the phone buzzed as they missed the prompt "Quite making me mess up you fuck".

"Oh a blond joke, real original" Sanji hissed, kicking out at Zoro's leg. Zoro managed to grab the long leg and he yanked Sanji off the couch. Sanji scrabbled for a hold on the couch but he went crashing with a curse. Zoro smirked down at the heep that was Sanji though it quickly turned to a look of surprise when the blond locked his ankles around Zoro's neck and yanked him off the couch to join Sanji on the floor.

Soon it devolved into another wrestling match, the two of them bumping into the furniture and nearly knocking things off as they went. The two eventually stopped when they were out of breath and they simply just laid side by side panting on the floor. "You're a cheating jackass" Zoro griped.

"Fuck you, it's your own fault you don't even know what the great wall of china is" Sanji huffed and sat up after a while. He cast a quick look at the time and hummed "it's getting kind of late, do you want to call it a night?".

"What? You tired of me already?" Zoro said dryly as he also sat up.

"Not that I don't enjoy you chaotically tearing up my home but I have to work in the morning, I didn't even expect it to go this late" Sanji said honestly as he pushed himself to his feet.

"I guess you're right, I did promise to help out a friend of mine tomorrow" Zoro said as he also stood and headed for the door. As he got there he paused and thought a moment then turned and called out "this wasn't half bad". After saying that he disappeared out the door before he could see the blond have any kind of smug self satisfied look that he knew the other would be making.


End file.
